Giving a great toast isn’t easy: that 2 hour public speaking seminar you took never helped, you’ve already had several glasses of wine, you can’t remember which holiday it is or the name of your best friend’s fiancé and also, you’re not funny anyways. What to do?
Next time you tap your fork on the side of a glass (or just stand and give a toast like a normal human being) come prepared with a quote from WA’s official list of acceptable rad quotes to toast with. Let’s face it, you just can’t lose so long as you say something like “The juice of the grape is the liquid quintessence of concentrated sunbeams.” You just can’t.
1) “It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend; one’s present or future thirst; the excellence of the wine; or any other reason.” – Traditional Latin Saying
2) “Either give me more wine or leave me alone.” – Maulana Jalal al-Din Rumi
3) “One should always be drunk. That’s all that matters… but with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you choose. But get drunk.” – Charles Baudelaire
4) “Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.” – Benjamin Franklin
5) “Wine makes all things possible.” – George RR Martin
7) “The discovery of a wine is of greater moment than the discovery of a constellation. The universe is too full of stars.” – Benjamin Franklin
8) “I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.” – Miguel Cervantes
9) “The juice of the grape is the liquid quintessence of concentrated sunbeams.” – Thomas Love Peacock
10) “Wine is one of the most civilized things in the world and one of the most natural things of the world that has been brought to the greatest perfection, and it offers a greater range for enjoyment and appreciation than, possibly, any other purely sensory thing.” – Ernest Hemingway